Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Partial Transcripts

Partial Transcripts

Omni-A true American African

With these tattoos and these bandanas, these knuckleheads thinkin’ that they gangsta,right?/just because you got dreadlocks, and you sell incense, y’all run around thinkin’ that you’re Rastafar-right?/ain’t nobody trippin’ if that’s what you all about/you ain’t trippin’ to that gun up in your mouth/you better know the truth, and you better know the roots/’cuz there’s real motherf*ers who will call your ass out.

***This is some REAL knowledge bein' spit by Omni-it's been a long time since I've heard this much flow come out of the West Side. I'm proud to be from here...I am so tired of these fake fools tryin' to represent rastafari, gangstas with day jobs, white girls with finger you-do you. Not an afrocentric religion whose hairstyle has a specific purpose, which is NOT for you to rub dish soap in your hair to "create" dreads. These white Oregon "dreadies" only practice the religion for an excuse to smoke weed...en punto.

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Motorcycle Diaries

It's time for a change...this man, this man who is idolized, deified, revered in Latin America finally made it to the silver screen. Although I read his biography several years ago, this movie made me cry. It is the pre-cursor to what was one of the greatest cross-continental revolutions in the history of the world. Many people love him, many people hate him...but he made an impact. He inspired people who had previously been without a voice to stand up and say "no". NO to imperialism, NO to oppressive dictatorships (although his closest comrade would later become one) NO to genocide. Someone who came from an upper middle class background and had absolutely no connection to the impoverished and oppressed indigenous population of South America before he went on a joyride with his best friend...made a difference. Imagine if a college kid went on spring break today and instead of running around Puerto Vallarta like a jackass drinking and saying "mamacita" in their gringo accent to any latina walking by...imagine if instead they sat down and respected people. Imagine if they (and not in the condescending hippie way) took the time to learn about the culture and then took up arms to defend those people...well it's too late for that now. Latin America doesn't need some liberal gringos bleeding out of their heart for them. It's time to raise up. It's time to stop being run over by their own governments. If their leaders are in the back pocket of the U.S.- then say something! If their leaders are committing genocide on indigenous people- raise up! Subcomandante Marcos is another example of a non-indigenous Latino who has organized a civil militia for the liberation of the indigenous people of Mexico. Lo único que yo sé es que me cansé de vivir la vida sin propósito.

Sunday, June 26, 2005

Mi Negrito Lindo...

"Tengo un moreno que está bien bueno...a mí me quiere y yo lo quiero..."

Friday, June 24, 2005

¿Por que nos quedamos?

Yo aquí en este momento estoy pensando en nosotras mujeres que tenemos el miedo de estar completamente solas. No me imagino por que con todas las mujeres bellas, finas, sabias, inteligentes, exitosas, y determinadas en este mundo, nos quedamos en una situación que no nos conviene. Gastamos más energía pidiendo, esperando, llorando, preguntando por que no nos gastaramos esas energías en organizarnos para que no fueramos tan solitas en este mundo...podríamos ser la fuerza más poderosa en el mundo. Si no tuvieramos el temor de vender la casa, dejar lo conocido, dejar la costumbre, dejar la vacía que por tantos años hemos sufrido hasta que la vacía se siente llena. Ni te puedo contar las veces que he esperado al lado de la ventana buscando que llegara el carro que contenga todos mis anhelos. Yo aquí en este asiento que compré para que pudiera escribir mis sentimientos...representa todo el rencor que siento en este momento. El día que lo viste me dijiste sin arrepentirte que odiabas este asiento.... Pero te digo con la punta brava: si me voy, es el único mueble que llevaré...y lo único que voy a dejar de ello es el rencor que siento ahora mismo. Por creer que tu palabra era de verdad. Por creer que tú vas a hacer lo que me has pedido que hiciera yo.
Nosotras mujeres tenemos un poder incontrolable. Nosotras mujeres tenemos la capacidad de reinar el mundo. Nosotras mujeres tenemos la fuerza de un tigre, y el tierno de una amapola soleada. Lo triste es que nunca lo vamos a realizar por que estamos incapacitadas llorando por un hombre que no nos aprecia. Al acostarme puedo sonreir un poquito con el imagen de lo que podría ser si secaramos las lagrimas....

Wednesday, June 22, 2005

You Have A Type A- Personality


You are one of the most balanced people around
Motivated and focused, you are good at getting what you want
You rule at success, but success doesn't rule you.

When it's playtime, you really know how to kick back
Whether it's hanging out with friends or doing something you love!
You live life to the fullest - encorporating the best of both worlds

The Symmetry of Children

I was sitting in church a couple weeks ago and started looking around me...I started noticing children...not in the same "I can't believe they are eating crackers and drooling all over the pews" look I usually give them, but I really looked at them. Have you ever noticed how symmetrical they are? Have you ever noticed the perfection of their faces, the contrast of their hair/eye/skin colors? In my church there are mostly people of Greek descent but we are a beautiful and diverse people. There are light tones like almond milk, there are those of us whose olive roots glisten underneath our skin, there are those that have skin like cherry wood....darker than many people of African descent in this country (but we are still categorized as "white"...don't ask me!) . I mused at how olive skin, blond hair, and steel grey eyes can make a child look mature yet with youthful perfection. I saw how their interactions with their parents, their friends, their siblings...rang with unmarred balance. Every teardrop, every smile, every blink of their eyes was artistic, expressive...and they didn't even try.
Posted by Hello

Friday, June 17, 2005

First Woman Gets Silver Star Since WWII

A 23-year-old sergeant with the Kentucky National Guard on Thursday became the first female soldier to receive the Silver Star—the nation's third-highest medal for valor—since World War II.

According to military accounts of the firefight, insurgents attacked the convoy as it traveled south of Baghdad, launching their assault from trenches alongside the road using rifles, machine guns and rocket-propelled grenades. Hester and her unit moved through enemy fire to the trenches, attacking them with grenades before entering and clearing them.

She killed at least three insurgents with her M4 rifle, according to her award citation. In the entire battle, 26 or 27 insurgents were killed and several more were captured, according to various accounts. Several Americans were also wounded in the firefight.

Current Pentagon policy prohibits women from serving in frontline combat roles—in the infantry, armor or artillery, for example. But the nature of the war in Iraq, with no real front lines, has seen women soldiers take part in close-quarters combat more than in any previous conflict.

****Your thoughts?

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Posted by Hello

Yo Te Adoro Puerto Rico....

After being gone from la isla for 8 whole years, I may have a chance to go back. As soon as I found out that it might be a possibility to go for my job...I started dreaming, and a torrent of memories tore through my mind on the hour-long commute home. The smell of overflowing sewage in el Paseo de Diego, pinchos con esa salsa hecha de que sé yo, Pollo Tropical, Cafetería Cabrera, Los Mexicanos (¿dónde estás Julito?) , Torre del Norte, dancing on the rooftop above a reggaeton concert with the crowd chanting "¡Culea! ¡Bellaca!" (at the time it was called Underground but it sho' has risen UP from under!) Isla Verde, Club Egipto, La Rumba en Calle San Sebastián, Bomba y Plena, canepas (un peso na' má, ¿tú tiene un chavito que me presta?) Medalla, Ocean Park, El Recinto de Río felt like you were going to a resort when you went to school! Los muchachos saliendo de la escuela en sus was damn hard to believe they were in high school...Ocho Blanco, the worst Chinese food I have ever eaten in my life, but don't you know I tripped out the first time I ordered Chinese food in Spanish and then the girl yells back to the cooks in Chinese....¿como fue? Diantre.... Manny Manuel was eating at the restaurant where I celebrated my 21st birthday, I have the pics to prove it! Most of all I remember becoming a woman in Borinquen. When I got there I was still a thugged out loca wearing baggy pants and sweatshirts; but you can't do that in PR. Nah....I went out and bought some booty shorts, minifaldas, and tacones plataformas real quick! My body, my soul, my bombazo...was set free. I learned not to get mad when men hollered...I learned to embrace it because Puerto Rico embraced me. I became one with myself, my sexuality. I was no longer afraid of what showing my legs would do to someone, I just did it. Things happen in Puerto Rico that just don't happen here like boys pulling alongside you in their car not to abduct you- just to offer you a rose. It was ridiculous! All along Avenida Muñoz Rivera.....I fell in love.

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

'Freedom' a Taboo Word on Chinese Internet

Chinese bloggers, even on foreign-sponsored sites, had better choose their words carefully—the censors are watching. Users of the MSN Spaces section of Microsoft Corp.'s new China-based Web portal get a scolding message each time they input words deemed taboo by the communist authorities—such as democracy, freedom and human rights. "Prohibited language in text, please delete," the message says. However, the restrictions appear to apply only to the subject line of such entries. Writing them into the text, with a more innocuous subject heading, seems to be no problem. Microsoft's Chinese staff could not be reached immediately for comment. However, a spokesman at the tech giant's headquarters in Seattle acknowledged that the company is cooperating with the Chinese government to censor its Chinese-language Web portal. Microsoft and its Chinese business partner, government-funded Shanghai Alliance Investment, work with authorities to omit certain forbidden language, said Adam Sohn, a global sales and marketing director for MSN. Online tests found that apart from politically sensitive words, obscenities and sexual references also are banned. MSN Spaces, which offers free blog space, is connected to Microsoft's MSN China portal. The portal was launched on May 26, and some 5 million blogs have since been created, Microsoft said. The Chinese government encourages Internet use for business and education but tries to ban access to material deemed subversive. Although details of the authorities' efforts are kept secret, users of many China-based Web portals are prevented from accessing sites deemed subversive by the government. A search on Google for such topics as Taiwan or Tibetan independence, the banned group Falun Gong, the Dalai Lama or the China Democracy Party inevitably leads to a "site cannot be found" message. Internet-related companies are obliged to accept such limitations as a condition of doing business in China. And government-installed filtering tools, registration requirements and other surveillance are in place to ensure the rules are enforced. Recently, the government demanded that Web site owners register with authorities by June 30 or face fines. Sohn said heavy government censorship is accepted as part of the regulatory landscape in China, and the world's largest software company believes its services still can foster expression in the country. The consequences of defying government limits can be severe: At least 54 people have been jailed for posting essays or other content deemed subversive online. The international media-advocacy group Reporters Without Borders has protested the online limits, sending letters to top executives of Microsoft, Yahoo, Google and other companies urging them to lobby Beijing for greater freedom of expression. (AP)
los ciegos Posted by Hello

Monday, June 13, 2005

Las gordas no están tan gordas en Santo Domingo...

Que gracioso fue cuando descubrí este reflejo chiquito de perspectivo en Santo Domingo...Nunca he sentido tan bonita más que en el caribe donde toda curva merece la alabanza....En los EEUU siempre estamos a dieta...negandonos la comida, terminando con almas hambrientes. Posted by Hello

¿Derechos? Coño.....

Posted by HelloPobre pendeja...

Sunday, June 12, 2005

Por fin hablamos

Ayer pasamos el día entero hablando...por fin me dijiste lo que te pasaba. Me dijiste que siempre te has sentido sólo en este mundo por que tu hermana y tu mamá siempre se han tenido, tu papá siempre ha estado en lo suyo, y tú no has tenido a nadie...traté de convencerte que ya no estás tan sólo, que estoy aquí y no te voy a dejar....por fin me dijiste que no quieres que escondamos las cosas...lo que no sabes son las cosas que he dejado por ti. No creo que tengo que avisarte cada vez que haya tentación en mi vida. Lo único que tienes que saber es que no me caigo con ella. Lo que más me afectó fue que me gusta que llegues al punto de llorar; yo sé que te da mucha pena. Sin embargo, me dió una satisfacción por que me enseñaste tu emoción, mostraste que tú también puedes estar débil a siento que ahora hemos derrotado una barrera que existía entre nosotros. Hasta fuiste al trabajo tarde para que pudieramos estar juntos un poquito más. Eso me gustó....que hiciste el sacrificio para mí y me enseñaste que al menos te importo más que el eso jamás he estado segura. Que tú eres una persona muy controlada...nunca fallas, siempre ganas. No sientes el arte, te da miedo el mío...pero al menos puedo decir que no me dejarías por causa de debilidad.

Friday, June 10, 2005

Ojitos verdes

Realmente si el mundo pudiera ver el vacío que vive en la profundidad de mi una oscuridad que me da una tremenda vergüenza.
Siempre soy la chica alegre con una sonrisa en la cara y unos pasitos de baile. Le tengo a todo el mundo engañado....lo que me motivan son eses ojitos verdes que iluminan mis sueños. Si pudiera guardarmelos aquí en el bolsillo por si acaso me falta la luz, te lo juro que te los entregaría algún día...pero en estos días la oscuridad me rodea por todos lados y necesito una llama para guiarme. ¿No tienes un fósforo que me prestas?

Dulces sueños....

So I fell asleep at 5:30 last night...what is going on with me? 12 hours of sueños me acuerdo de ninguno...We haven't had a conversation in over a week. You slept next to me last night for the first time since I can usually fall asleep watching that stupid TV in the next room. It's weird but I'm not even sad...I'm actually relieved that we are living this life and I'm not chasing you around the house asking when you're going to have time to talk to me. I'm not trying to come between you and your precious television...more time for me to read books. It's pointless to try to mold you into someone you're not; I am letting you do your thing and I'll do mine. Sometimes I look back to my dreams of having someone in my life that recognizes me for who I am and isn't afraid to tell me. In turn, he would accept the compliments and admiration I have for's that simple- don't fight me, just relax and open your ears and look at me when I'm talking to you. I don't think I'm asking for much...but you have shown me over the past 6 years that I am. I remember 2 years ago when I went to Miami and came back a new woman. You noticed a change in me and you were right. I remember just letting you go and you noticed it. I am not going to continue this pattern of cat and mouse. If you want me, come and talk to me. If you think I'm ignoring you, then ask me what's going on. I'm not rude, I still talk to you with respect...but I'm not going to beg for your attention. This isn't about someone else, this is about me. I have a lot of dreams I'm trying to fulfill right now and I can't be bogged down with worries about you accepting or supporting them. I'm going on this ride and if you want to come along I'll slow down so you can hop on, but don't be a backseat driver. I'll share my health and my wealth, just don't be jealous of it.

Wednesday, June 8, 2005


Anoche pensé escucharte susurrando con otra...anoche mientras yo intentaba acostarme después de estudiar la contabilidad....que ironía por que no puedo conseguir el balance en mi vida, no me imagino por que la contabilidad se me hace difícil...
Cuando nos hemos visto en los últimos días, nos saludamos y seguimos el camino. Me imagino que estás pensando que algo me pasa, pero tienes que saber que sólo te estoy tratando a la manera que siempre me tratas a mí. ¿Te gusta cuando te doy respuestas monosílabas? Ahora, ve tu reflejo en mi falta de te vuelven vacías y sin sentido como se me hace tu cariño.

Tuesday, June 7, 2005

Mejor Día...

I fell asleep crying last night...It had been there...beating under my diaphragm all day long yesterday. A looming storm of emotion and it finally precipitated as he left the house. He said goodbye and I responded with my head under the covers, crying silently...I couldn't let him know I was crying or being weak...not before he goes to work. He has to be 100% prepared, emotionally, mentally. Far be it for me to damper his work day. I slept from 6:30pm to 5:40am, but woke up several times in the night to check the clock. I dreamed that I was at Jimmy Fallon's house and his dogs were trying to make out with me; he kept telling me it was ok...Jimmy Fallon is not always a funny guy.
Today once again I am with my black coffee, imitation creamer/sweetener and instant oatmeal; Cinnamon Roll flavor. Can I get any more fake? Nothing I'm ingesting is real. Not the light, not the food, not the coffee...My life is an unbroken chain of artificial nonsense. When am I going to start getting REAL?

Monday, June 6, 2005

¡Un coraje ENORME!

Me levanté muy mal hoy...con el coraje de un gigante cubierto por hormigas rojas....
Yo aquí en esta vaina de café negro...con una leche falsa y dulzura agria...como mi vida que no tiene ni leche ni carne de verdad en este momento...
Siento que mi vida entera está hecha de falsedades...mis amores, mis inteligencias, mi dinero...tal como me aparecen se me hacen en vapor....
Con amigos que cuestionan nuestra conexión sólo por razones de político...que se jodan esa gente poco yo respeto a sus opiniones y a sus decisiones, ¿que carajo tienen contra mí?
Al diablo con toda esa gente que me tratan como un mojon que le tiró un pinche perro....
Al diablo con esa gente que no reconocen mi talento, mi potencial, mi cuando tenga mi MBA se darán cuenta; pero bendito...que ya será tan tarde. Ya les habría caído la setencia final. Qué se me vayan de la vida....que se me alejen y me dejen en paz. Yo aquí con mi café negro y falsedades estoy mucho mejor que con sus pendejadas que sólo me hacen daño...Como dicen...
¡Despierta Coño!

Saturday, June 4, 2005

Am I Smart Enough?

What kind of a question is that? Of course you're smart girl! That's what they tell got into grad school, you got the job with the company you wanted, you are respected in your community...why would you question yourself? Why now after you worked so hard...took the GMAT, got the score to get you into the school of your choice, and now you are thinking about journalism? What is wrong with you? I think the MBA will get you farther in life...but what do I know? Why do you always second guess yourself? Where is your passion? Where is your life heading? Will you ever write? Right now your writing looks like crap. Sure, you can write a paper for school and get an A, but can you write? Get the MBA, you can always write later. Plus, there's nothing stopping you from writing with an's a respected degree, but do you think you'll get tired of it? Do you really want to go into Marketing? What is it that you love? You love analysis, you love people, you love love writing...but you also love Latin America...the politics, the economy, the culture. Nothing is worse than a writer with no life experience. Go see it, become an expert then write about it. See the world on the corporate dime, do your dance on the dance floor, then write about it. Explore Brazil, Caracas, Greece, Spain, the people, lose yourself to them...listen... listen......LISTEN! Santo Domingo te llama.....te está rumba te está susurrando...ven, ven, ven a gozar, ven a guayar, ven a apuntar tu nombre aquí en esta pista mujerrrr.....héchate pa'lante pa'que no te empujen pa'tras! Eso es lo que te está diciendo bajo la alfombra....súbete pa'l monte y grita con inspiración: "Yo desde este monte cruzaré al otro lado donde me espera el éxito, la fama, y la satisfacción! No me detendrá nadie, ni el temor ni la falta de valor, por que YO SOY la que vino a representar la voz de los sordomudos." Esto es lo que me inspira a mejorarme....

Thursday, June 2, 2005

What is wrong with people?'s my first blog and I'm already complaining! I decided I needed something to keep me busy between lulls at work (lately there have been a lot) and I can't afford therapy anymore so you people will have to tolerate my neurosis.
I am really irritated that a couple of my friends have insinuated that my mother is anything less that virtuous. My mom is recently divorced and dating one man....ONE! May I add only after 2 years of her initial separation from my stepfather of 15 years. My mom has joined a single's group and is having the time of her life. She is a gorgeous, vivrant, prayerful woman; and at 57 is finally being free, herself. She helps everyone who comes her way, including risking her own life (and giving my sister and me ulcers) by housing a friend who is a battered woman in an abusive 20 year marriage.
So my mom has this party at her house and she and her friends are belly dancing (she is Greek/Sicilian and has a Syrian male friend and they decided to acculturate some of their Anglo homiez) and the Syrian guy suggests they should raise money for the battered woman friend living with my mom, so they dance and raise $85. It's not a lot of money, but as you can see my mom has no problem expressing herself through dance and culture all the while promoting social justice/feminism...her way. So I tell my friend about it who by the way has ISSUES with her own mom and she says (snide tone)
"If that were in a different place what would you call it? I mean, dancing and getting money?" I say "She wasn't stripping! She was belly happens in a lot of places and it's not stripping!" What the HELL would possess someone to insinuate that my mom is a stripper and why would you say it to ME? I am a grown woman, 28 years old...we are not on the playground telling mama jokes anymore...this really bothers me! I don't share things like that with my friends for them to turn around and insult my family. My mom may be a lot of things, but a stripper she is not. I am and always will be very protective of her...throughout most of my life I have been the adult in the relationship...including now. I am trying to let her do what she wants and not offer up my opinion about what she is doing with her life. She is picking up where she left of in her adolescence so I am getting a lot of the lines I used as a 16 year old thrown back in my face...the only way we are going to get even close to her becoming the adult in the relationship is to let her make her own decisions, express herself, and live her life the way she wants. I know this sounds weird, but it's what happens sometimes....
I don't know how to approach my friend about this, but I'm sure I'll find the words. I don't like to cause unrest in my friendships, but I woke up with this on my mind so I know it's going to bug me until I resolve it.