Parlor Games

So I have a project room- and I am taking the opportunity to make it as sexy and unobtainable as possible. Above you will see the sofa I chose for the room, a simple retro-fit cream leather that is perfect for any décor. Below you will see just 2 of the chairs I chose- the side and sofa tables were not available online for viewing. This room will be almost all black and white, with some dark walnut accents on the tables. My Sister The Artist is making me custom paintings to fit my room and helping me with spatial layout to enhance the visual splendor to those that walk through my front door. I am badly in need of a round area rug, preferably in cream. This is my Donatella Versace/Tasteful Mafia Wife playground in which I can hold white wine socials (there won't be a nary merlot near these gems, BELIEVE me!) and church lady lectures. I DO think I have better taste than Carmela Soprano, though. I'm calling it Italian Modern meets her Sicilian cousin on the holidays. Unlike some people, I refuse to try to be tasteful at Christmas- which I will outline in my post-Christmas décor rant. Think poinsettas snuggled cozily with gold lamé...and love it.

Tilt

Discovered a must-have set of crystal today...and she goes by the name Nambé Tilt Collection. I've been looking at a lot of beautiful things lately so I decided to fancy myself a design aficionada for several reasons, but here are a few:

1. I just bought oodles of furniture to fill up space in my 1st floor and I need lovely things to sprinkle around them.
2. I just came out of 8 months in PR and worked very closely with cutting edge designers and critics who are connected in the fashion/art/design world.
3. My sister is a designer and I run everything past her for the final approval.
4. I have always had an eye for design, even if I couldn't design my way out of a cardboard box.
5. I have a burning obsession to avoid ever being tacky and uncultured unless of course I'm trying to be in an effort to show just how much I rebel against societal norms.
6. I have decided that just about everything with swirly-swoops and bordeaux-ish details makes me sick and reminiscent of gaudy try-to-bes-that-never-were.
7. I like clean, simple lines with a dash of mania.
8. I'm just a country girl with a city heart who lives in the suburbs and has too much space on her hands.

There you have it folks. Clean, simple, neurotic.

-La Tremenda Trigueña-

La Tentación

I must admit that being a married woman has its ups and downs, as I'm sure it does being a married man. We all have our weaknesses and if it were easy I suppose there wouldn't be a 50 or 60% divorce rate in this country. However, that's not what I'm here to talk about today. What I will say is I have come to terms with some very harrowing realizations about making a marriage last, and things we not only have to accept about our partner, but even more so about ourselves.

Temptation will always come in the sweetest form possible.

• I'll tell you what I mean. Just when you think things are going well with you and your spouse and you're able to ignore the things that most irritate you about him/her, someone will inevitably come along who has what you think you're lacking or who doesn't do that very caustic thing that makes you want to scratch your eyes out. They will come in the form of Christians, Tibetan monks, deli owners, teachers, doctors, co-workers, waiters, priests, disco kings, MBA students, you name it. They will almost always come in a form that seems totally harmless, helpful even. You will try to justify to yourself why you must have communication with them, why that email won't do anyone any harm, why you have to meet them to study or help their kids out with free sporting equipment for their softball team. You will make excuses to see them and you will always try to look your best in anticipation of seeing them.

You're not that strong no matter what you think.

• There comes a time when all the self-denial in the world will come crashing around your head and you. will. fall. You cannot occupy your thoughtlife with their image and likeness while your spouse is sleeping next to you and not expect them to suspect something. You cannot go alone with people who you are or are not even attracted to even if it seems like a harmless outing...Eventually, someone will do or say the wrong thing and everything you've worked for will be thrown to the wayside.

Your spouse can play the same game.

• Don't think that they won't catch on. Don't think that they will always confront you if they do. Don't think that you're more slick than they, or that they can't hide innocent little flirtations. Don't think that the aforementioned is not very, very dangerous. Women: we often seek out emotional reassurance. Men: you often seek out sexual reassurance. Plain and simple. If aren't giving that to your spouse, they will withdraw. By withdrawing, you create a wider chasm between the two of you. Your thoughts govern your emotions, and your emotions govern your actions. There's this strange little receptor that I believe God places in our brains that drives us to suspect when something isn't right in our marriage. I honestly believe it's biological, and it serves a very important purpose- to get things back to where they need to be.

Cherish your spouse. Appreciate their attraction to you, and don't let petty little attention you get from other people go to your head, because it won't last. If you are married and they're chasing after you it shows a lack of moral fortitude and they are not a worthy way to spend your thoughts, words, or energy.

Voilá mi gente- allí está y se acabó.

~TT~

I love this picture- it's where my head's at right now...relaxation, stress relief. I'm in a new department now, MUCH less hectic than where I was since last March. I went to a traditional Korean day spa last Friday and got the salt scrub in which they lay you on a padded table and scrub you with salt and water until all your dead skin rolls off and they rinse you with buckets of warm water every couple minutes or so. Even though it might seem like a terrible irritant it was actually quite soothing and I even nodded off at times.

Other than that, MMM and I purchased an entire floor of furniture a few weeks ago- formal living room, family room, dining room, and a futon for the guest room. All in all I was extremely satisfied with our purchase and quite proud of my eye for good design. In addition, we landscaped our entire front yard, bought a brand new LCD TV with all the home theater components like speakers, receiver, sub woofer (HATE that word)...I am feeling much more "made" than I did a year ago.

Fighting off a nasty cough/cold right now, but other than that I'm doing OK. School is stressful but manageable, I just need to get myself caught up and I'll be fine. Oh yeah- and I turned 30 on October 21st, I'm a real grownup now.
Gotta go, Stats just started.

-TT-

What's a Month and a Half?

After accusations of being comatose, I have decided to take a couple minutes for myself and get over work for a minute.
I have been in a whirlwind of travel, work, near separation, and financial aid suspension in the past couple months. I have been desperately trying to keep my head above water, my bills paid, and not lose my mind in the meantime.
I started back to school this week and almost had a panic attack last night pondering my leftover thoughts of inadequacy from the summer semester. I really had to talk myself through the fact that I can focus my priorities and tell people 'no' when I need to. Honestly, school has got to come first, but work has to still be there so I can pay the bills. I won't be going out/contributing to society/attending benefit dinners/parties until the holidays. It just has to be that way. I hate being a jerk and not pleasing everyone, but honestly my head is about to explode with all the whining I'm getting from people. I will probably have lost all my friends by December of '08 when I graduate, but that's a chance I'll have to take. As long as I am still married I will consider it a great accomplishment.
Other than that, I have had 2 travel experiences in the past month and a half in which I was told the same day that I had to fly to New York. Well, one was the day before...I shouldn't be too picky. The 1st time, I had to fly to NYC (which is 5 hours of flying non-stop from here for those of you on the east coast) with a suitcase full of samples to go to a photo shoot which was already over when I got there. I basically went there for no reason, so I decided to make the best of it and go shopping, take myself out to dinner and go dancing.
The 2nd time, I was in Seattle visiting my family and my boss called me on a Saturday afternoon telling me I had to fly to New York for a WEEK and save a documentary from certain destruction. Don't get me wrong- it was a great trip, I learned a lot, and had a chance to shine, but...now that school has started back, I absolutely cannot fly at the drop of a hat like that anymore. I know I got a D in Finance in the summer partly due to my conflicting priorities of work, school, and home and I don't want to repeat that.
Can I say how happy I am that I think we might be getting an early autumn? I swear, during the summer the sun comes out and my motivation evaporates. The fall arrives and it's back to high-heel boots and mid-terms.
In other news, I saw that my company is expanding marketing opportunities to the Miami area which I would love nothing more than to move there in a couple years whenI get my MBA. I think that in order to advance my career the way I want, I will have to move to S. Florida...(sorry Joke)
I'm sure my husband won't be thrilled at first, but I think it would be the best move for us. I think a couple years there and I will be ready to come back to the NW- but it seems inevitable.
That said, I'm off to a meeting. It's good to be back!
-TT-