Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Taking Life by the...Pillow?
Most of you who know me have been following my road to success watching me writhe in anticipation for the new job while I dragged you through every bloody detail. You saw me freak out before and after the interview, and you saw me lose my cotton pickin' mind when they had the randomly good sense to give me the job and a fat raise.
As I'm in the 3rd week of the new gig and nearing the end of the 1st semester of grad school....I've decided to take a look back at what I have. For so many years I was always looking ahead, never satisfied with what I had. I could never wait for the weeks to be over so I would be one step closer to getting whatever I was doing over with. Whether it was school, a job, Easter, whatever...my mind was always 3 steps ahead of my body.
Right now my current schedule consists of: working full-time, commuting 2 hours a day, going to school 2 days a week, spending whole weekends catching up on homework, and the most important thing- being married! The problem is, I haven't been able to really attend to my duties as a wife and homemaker because the other priorities won't wait. I hardly go to church anymore, and I can feel myself slipping away spiritually.
So I sat back, looked at what I have and decided to do something I never thought would cross my mind: LESS. I already have the dream job and my education helps me with work and I can apply what I learn at school to my job and vice versa, but who says I have to go as fast as possible? So I wrote out a new plan, and basically what I have decided is I can't waste these years wishing they would pass by. I have decided to consciously keep myself in the present and appreciate the suspension.
While I hate to be cliché, I thought I would take this time to truly be thankful at Thanksgiving. These years won't be here forever, and before I know it I will be getting Botox and going through menopause. I think God gives us things and he wants us to be satisfied with them for a little while. I have plenty of time to do the things I want to do and still enjoy my life. I only have half a house worth of furniture, no landscaping, and there are a million projects I haven't finished....I will finish school a year later than I planned and I will have kids when I have them, and that's just fine with me...